Shall We, M'Dear?: A Look at Romance (Sec. 1)

Ahaha! I made it back! Finally, I possess a laptop, so that means I can post once more!

Ahem. Moving onto today's long-as-hell topic of choice: romance. A bit of a touchy subject in today's fandom-based world. What? Don't believe me? Look at how many popular shows and books and such and such are based on someone else's creations.

Laurie R. King's Mary Russel series? Why, thank you, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle. Or perhaps that's not your thing? Look at all the Marvel movies this year. Or movies based on books. Hell, they even made a movie of 'Diary of A Wimpy Kid'.

But all of this fandom happiness (admit it, you love it when this shit happens) leads to one thing. One thing, and it's very, very sad.

That's right. Shipping wars.

Goddamn it, guys. Guys. Guys, stop this right now.

Look, I'm all for a good ship-war, but this is ridiculous! Everywhere. Everywhere I see people with slash-goggles or anti-slash-goggles permanently affixed to their heads, and when the more creative of those people get angry, and the fandom has gone pub-dom, well...

Alright, enough with the GIFs, because you know and I know that they're basically page filler, albeit amusing page filler.

Perhaps I'm going off on a tangent here. Ultimately, the goal of this post was not to rant about the idiots and their ship-wars. It was to try and stop people from writing crappy romance and posting it on the internet. Nothing I say will do that, but maybe the four people looking at this thing will  spread the word (I doubt it).

In other words, this is going to be a long-ass, motherfucking post.

Let's start this out organised, and break it down. This will be done in three parts, split up according to the genders involved, and try to address as many subgenres as quickly is possible. Before we start, no, I'm not homophobic, that's not why this is split up. Fuck.

Okay, preface out of the way. Onto the actual post.

Section 1. Heterosexual (Straight) Romance

Oh, fuck, here we go.

LET'S TRY TO ADDRESS THE CREEPY-AS-FUCK TURN MOST ROMANCE NOVELS ARE GOING DOWN, mkay?

Also, this will focus primarily on YA fiction, because that's what I write, and will continue to write, Fiction Gods be willing, and a smattering of adult fiction.

What was I talking about?

RIGHT, THE CREEPY-AS-FUCK TURN romance has been taking.

Has anyone else noticed this? All the romance books I've been reading (and fanfiction, too) has been glorifying what is essentially an abusive relationship. Want examples? Fifty Shades of series, Twilight series, House of Night novels, Vampire Diaries... Oh, perhaps you were looking for fanfiction? Let's look at the recent explosion of stuff that has been blown out of the ass of such notable shows as Sherlock (Irene Adler's cool, but I really don't think Sherlock would be cool with all this) or Glee (teenage girls are not that vulnerable, people!)

Now, don't get me wrong. There are definitely girls who idolise the sort of controlling relationships that are portrayed in these works or fanworks. The only notable pairing I can think of that steps out of these boundaries would be the Adler/Holmes, stuff, and that's only because the majority of fic portrays Sherlock as a complete and total pussy, in or out of the bedroom. (There are, of course, people who execute the sub/dom lifestyle well; if that is you, this isn't directed at you).

It's sending a hell of a message to girls these days. How many of you remember the general teenage reaction to Chris Brown and Rihanna? Yeah, that SHE was in the wrong, that she 'should have stood by her man' (quote attributed to an NPR show). Those same girls lap up the Twilight series and its recent sister-series like they were manna in the desert.

Not to mention (okay, totally mentioning it) the recent trend of fictional men who don't know how to not stalk and abuse women.

LOOK AT HIS FACE. LOOK AT IT. If that doesn't scream 'I'm going to watch you so closely that you will never have to worry about other men looking at you, my sweet sugar lips' than nothing ever will.

God, I have to type with that blinking in my face. The sacrifices I make for you guys.

The positive side is that no guy wants to be caught dead with one of these novels (and I do hesitate to use that term here). The negative side is that their girlfriends dragged them to the movie, or they watch a televised rip off, or they read Fifty Shades of Grey at the behest of their friends and family.

Now, I'm sure that in certain social circles, these terrible farces of literary hemorrhage are considered 'a good read' (not a quote from anyone, thank god). But you wouldn't be reading this if you enjoyed that sort of thing, anyway.

So. Let's try to give a few pointers on creating believable romance (I promise, it comes in angsty, half and half, and angst-free.)

1. Strong Female/Male Narration

I really can't emphasise this enough. If your character is strong, it isn't hard to fall in love with them. Male, female, alien, genderqueer, doesn't matter.

That doesn't mean, of course, that they are flawless. An example of strong female narration (even though it isn't necessarily good romance) would be Hunger Games. No groans, now, guys; let's face it, Katniss may be disdained by the hipster-crowd and revered by the masses, but when push comes to shove, Katniss Everdeen don't give a fuck. Ever. It's like the fuck-giving gene is completely absent from her biological makeup.

She doesn't cry and break down when she gets cut; she cries when (SPOILER ALERT) her sister dies because of stupid fucking reasons that were perfectly preventable had anyone thought at all. She ends up as happy as someone with severe post-traumatic stress disorder could in a world without the necessary intensive therapy, and throughout it all she manages to look so bad ass that even Twilight fangirls have been converted.

Regardless of your personal opinions on the book, Katniss was an example of strong narration (someone who, ultimately, was easy to love.)


2. Common Sense.

If your significant other really, really likes the idea of you hurt, and you aren't similarly turned on by that thought, most people call that a deal-breaker.


Unless you're in a romance novel!!!

Seriously, can I see one story where the girl doesn't subjugate her own soul to please the guy, and/or the guy is controlled by his 'empowered' (read: abusive) girlfriend? It's like no one's aware that the 'sub/dom' switch is less of a switch than a dial. There is such a thing as equality.

3. Realistic Expectations.

This is about to go down a road you won't expect:

If your characters are teenagers, it is absolutely a good call to have them believe that love lasts forever.

I know, I've been ranting about healthy relationships for a while now, but ultimately, teenage/young adult relationships all have this snag. The relationship ends, and they might see it coming, but sure as the sun rises in the fucking east, they won't believe it until it slaps them in the face with the cold, still-flopping fish of reality.

Or the mirror. Whatever.

Sections Two and Three will be published at a later date. Thakns.

Tech Post: Other Sites To Find Me On

Tumblr: http://worldsofmydevising.tumblr.com/

DA: http://proser132.deviantart.com/

Fictionpress: http://www.fictionpress.com/u/655382/proser132

Fanfiction: Solely archive purposes now. All new stuff and favourite old stuff will be moved to AO3. http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1761737/proser132

AO3: http://archiveofourown.org/users/proser132/pseuds/proser132
          http://archiveofourown.org/users/proser132/pseuds/Proser

That's the list. You can reach me through any of the above links, save FFN, which I am leaving posthaste.

Cultural Incongruities: Mapping Out A Society

Hello, sci-fi fans (few that I must have through the long and recent hiatus)! This one's for you (well, and fantasy readers, but mostly you). Ah, how I've missed you all from my podunk corner of the world!

Anyway. To business. And by business, I mean a post beginning on a tangent.

How many of you like Star Wars? Or Star Trek (no, I'm not equating the two, nor am I disclosing my own preference)? Now, what do you like about it?

Let's make a list.

1. The action.
2. The plot.
3. The music.
4. the characterisations.
5. The worlds.

None of that is in order of importance to the over-all effect, by the way. If it was, it'd look like this:

5. The Music.
4. The Action.
3. The Characterisations.
2. The Plot.
1. The Worlds.

And do you know why, precisely, world construction comes first in that lengthy list? Let me give you an example. Suppose you visit Istanbul. You peer through all the little side streets, explore the ruins, perhaps visit a mosque or two. Nothing fancy, really -- you're just experiencing a city, albeit one of the most beautiful cities in the world (in this humble author's opinion).

Now suppose you've been hired to write a film set in Istanbul. You do so, and they offer to have you direct, and you try to commission the most realistic set of Istanbul they can get, short of filming there in the first place. You go in, and realise that it's just a bunch of cardboard cut-outs. So, like any other director not trying to skimp out on your movie, you just film in Istanbul in the first place. Get my drift?

No? Here, let me spell it out for you. The set was just cardboard cutouts. It was every stereotypical thing you could imagine about Istanbul, but it wasn't Istanbul. It had no life, no depth, no nothing. (Ignore my double negative there). How would you make it breath?

Well, you'd start with people. No matter how shitty the construction of your city, it still houses thousands of people. Indigenous folk are a good place to start -- what does the average denizen of your city act like? Are they snobbish, or constantly angry? Dazed with euphoria, pissy as hell, gentle but cautious? Are the poor, middle-class, filthy rich?

Is it a tourist spot? Would there be people from other cities, other worlds, other galaxies? What attracts them -- the atmosphere, the food, the gambling? Are they desperate for tourism?

Is it a specialised planet, or is it more like Earth -- many cultures, many languages? Or all one language, one culture? (Cracked.com makes a good point about this.And by 'good point', I mean drills home the fact that it's a stupid thing to do.)

But, Victory! You whine like the nonexistent readers you are. You're talking about cities! You're talking about planets! What about the title? What about societies?

True, societies are more (much, much more) than just a city, just a planet. But I'm not done with you yet. Because so far, all we've done is talk about the backdrop. Remember my Istanbul analogy above? So far, all we've done is construct the basic city and littered it with extras. We're not done yet.

So... to the people. What kind of people are they? Assuming (for the sake of simplicity) that they are all one race, are there any dominant traits among them? Not just physical ones, mind you, but psychological ones -- are they stubborn as a people? Violent? Kind? Meek? Defiant, supportive -- any of a thousand different traits can be applied here.

And then, as a painter varies hues, you'll vary the intensity. Some people will be kinder than others, or more hostile. Are there sub-cultures in your society? Are there warriors, artists, entertainers, caretakers, social workers? OR are all of them specialised (see Star Trek/Wars, where they've never bothered to populate a planet with more than one kind of people) in one field, like cooks, or architects?

Now, consider their values. What do they prize in an ideal individual? Remember: these people may be very different from you. Sometimes, it's hard to distance yourself from a character or a city, but you have to remember that they aren't you. There are going to be parts of them that you don't like -- maybe they prize truth above all else, but punish lying (any lying) with death, regardless of the need for a lie. That they do that just makes them more plausible. Remember, though! Don't go to extremes just to impress your reader -- sometimes the most believable character is the understated one.

A cute little segue I just gave myself, straight to the main and supporting characters. Are you going to play up certain aspects of their cultural heritage? Do they wrestle with certain ideals/values of their society, or embrace them? Perhaps they're uncomfortable with people who act differently, or trust them to keep their own values away from the main character's. They might work well with one kind of person, and terribly with another.

However, it's important to remember: all the work you just put in above may never be seen by the reader. But your knowledge of the society as a whole will flavour your work and make it more real, make it tip the scales in the favour of belief. And when writing sci-fi, that barrier -- the transition from disbelief to belief -- is what separates good books from great books.

That's all for today, but the next post will be something that applies to all genres, not just sci-fi. Yep, we're looking at the Hero archetype and how to spice it up.

See you next time!